"Whenever I go into a restaurant, I order both a chicken and an egg to see which comes first"

Wednesday, January 10, 2024

You Can't Make This Shit Up - The Hilarious Grand Guignol Of January 6th And The Hysteria Of The Left

Paul Revere's militias are at the ready, and the American volunteers are ready to storm British emplacements.  The time is right and Revere sets off to signal the attack.  'One if by land, two if by sea' is the message passed to American revolutionaries. The end of colonial oppression, penury, and insult will soon be over, and a new American Republic will stand proud. 


On January 6th, 2021 a group of ragtag, Mardi Gras revelers dressed in Brunhilda wigs and  horned Viking helmets marched their way to the Capitol and stormed their way in.  It was a circus scene of bearded ladies, dwarves, freaks, and headless horsemen led on by who knows what Idaho Panhandle loonies, backwoods fanatics who startled everyone with their operatic hysteria.  

Progressives however were quick to call this absurd backcountry hoe-down an insurrection, a serious revolutionary plot led by Donald Trump to take over the government of the United States.  Trump, they said, had planned this for years as a vengeful act for having lost a rigged election.  The march on Washington was no less than a well-orchestrated coup intended to empty the halls of Congress and fill them with Trumpists, men and women who said they would make America great again. 

What could be more ridiculous?  Not one of the Democratic name-callers had ever been within 1000 miles of a real insurrection - the Sandinistas in Nicaragua, the death squads of El Salvador, or the bloody civil wars in Angola and Mozambique.  They knew ISIS only by its letters, Uzis, and keffiyehs; and had no understanding whatsoever about their bloody intention to create a Middle Age Islamic caliphate from East to West.  

This January 6th charade was nothing more than crazies coming out of the backwoods with their cousins and drinking buddies to do some damage.  These dressed-up, caparisoned, festooned fools had no idea what they were doing except to belch and fart and show the world that they were not prognathous-jawed Neanderthals but men with a purpose.

Of course they had no purpose other than mayhem.  Their 'insurrection' was no more than a clown show with  Clarabell bonking Bozo with squeaky plastic mallets, a parody of The Three Stooges. 

A mess. A frightening scene for representatives from safe districts who had up till this point been concerned with race, gender, and ethnicity and then at the first pounding at the chamber doors had run for their lives, scrambled to hide in cloak rooms, under desks, and in antechambers.  A bit cowardly, perhaps, but these men and women had not been elected to face down the wildest-looking bunch of weird savages they had ever seen. 

So, humiliated by their reaction, still afraid of more but finally realizing the whole thing was a strange bit of an America they had only heard about, they ran for cover.  They had heard about the crazies in the Northwest woods arming themselves, forming stockades, moats, and razor wire perimeters, but were never really sure they existed, yet here they were, toothless bastards coming for them. 

Trump, the man they had reviled for years - a man of evil intent, a traitorous, devilish man of venomous hatred - had to be behind the event.  He had never once shown a respect for the polity of the America, its diverse communities, and its democratic representatives.  He showed his vile ignorance when he challenged the 2020 election, a legitimate electoral exercise and its hero, their new President Biden.  Of course Trump was behind the 'insurrection', progressives now called the fol-de-rol of January 6th, the grand guignol, the Punch and Judy show. 

The affair would become both a progressive cause celebre and the centerpiece of the campaign to re-elect the President. 

Biden's policies have made no sense at all to the majority of Americans - an exaggerated, burlesque twisting of normal sexuality into an unrecognizable mishmash of gender options; a geopolitical ignorance not seen since Chamberlain and Munich; a flimsy, idealist energy policy within a hysterical save-the-planet environmentalism; and a do-nothing attitude towards illegal immigration - let as many brown and black people as possible into America and make it truly diverse - and so the campaign is and can only be about hating Trump.  As such it is doomed to failure for the man is wildly popular, cheered, applauded, and greeted like a conquering Roman hero. 


The Left still cannot come to grips with this phenomenon.  How could it be that this Devil, this incarnation of evil, this misogynistic, homophobic, racist could possibly have any followers at all?  Can't they see what we see?

Of course this is the problem.  What they - the Left of received wisdom and rectitude - see has nothing to do with America at large.  It is a nation which has never lost its way, and waves of immigration since the early 20th century, regardless of national origin, have subscribed to if not embraced its ethos of opportunity, work, individualism, faith, and responsibility.  Progressives do not intend to reform what they see is a fallen America but to reconfigure it into a weird Maurice Sendak place of childish fantasy and fear.


So, Biden, now a frail and stumbling old man who makes little sense at all, reads from a prepared script and asks people not to vote for him exactly, but to vote against Donald Trump.  The Left is afraid of Trump, terribly afraid, and cannot chase the specter of him once again in the Oval Office,  Such an event would not only be an electoral defeat but a dismissal of their God-anointed policies.  They shudder at the thought, for most good progressives have believed in a neo-socialist, communitarian, Utopian dream since their early days.  A second Trump victory would be tantamount to the Devil's reign.

However, the Left is so deeply caught within a political web of their own making - a confining net of self-appointed righteousness - that they cannot meet Trump on his own terms, that of a brawler, a street-fighter, a thug.  Biden cannot match Trump's outsized personality, his trophy women, his glitz, glamour, resorts, and yachts.  Trump is a real American - politically incorrect, impatient, a bar-fighting, down-and-dirty man of the mean streets. Nobody loves Joe Biden or wants to be him.  They want him to go away, retire to Florida, take his leisure on a chaise lounge. 

So the Democrats only have poor Joe Biden and his failed program of old political chestnuts to count on. Already the attempted shutting down of dissent in the name of a ridiculously lame, faux 'tolerance' is being challenged.  Trump's time has come once again; and in fact it has never gone away. 

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