Wednesday, October 26, 2016
Discrimination Against Men–Claims Of Universal Misogyny And The Moderating Role Of Strong Women
This is The Year of the Woman (2016). Not only is a woman running for President of the United States, but she has made her sex an issue. The fact that she is the first woman to run for the office is beside the point, lost in her radical feminist attacks on men. Although her slams are aimed at Donald Trump - a sexist, woman-hating, abusive misogynist – women understand that she is taking up the cudgel against all men who, no different from Trump, harbor and express their disdain, disregard, and dismissal of women.
The animus is understandable and predictable, women say. Little boys are treated differently and specially. They are given sexual license while little girls are taught to be demure, chaste, and complaisant. Boys’ sexual enthusiasm is dismissed as ‘boys will be boys’ but any sign of girls’ flirtation or ‘come hither’ suggestions are disciplined.
It is quite natural for boys to grow up as crude, undisciplined misogynists. How in a sexist world and within male-favoring families could they possibly be otherwise?
Today’s woman, as embodied in Hillary Clinton, has had enough. She has suffered slights, sexual innuendo, unwanted advances, and sexual abuse her whole life, and it is time to put a stop to it.
Hillary, consummate politician that she is, understands the zeitgeist of America. Men are on the run everywhere. Universities accept all women’s claims of sexual impropriety, and deny the accused men of due process. College administrators create safe spaces for women to isolate them from their predatory male classmates. Threatening gestures, words, looks, and insinuations are considered potentially abusive, and men are schooled in how to behave with women so not to give even the slightest intimation of offense.
Women on the other hand are given free rein. How they dress, no matter how provocative, is considered their own business. If it arouses men, that’s their problem. They must wait in the wings blue-balled until called. Girls can drink as much as they want without concern for consequences. If they consent to a sexual encounter under the influence of alcohol which they might not have if sober, they have been raped. Women can act with impunity while men are always under suspicion.
If this is not a heating up of the war between the sexes, nothing is. The fact that women label all men as potential rapists is as slanderous and pernicious a discrimination as any. Discrimination is defined as “the unjust or prejudicial treatment of different categories of people or things, especially on the grounds of race, age, or sex”. In women’s blanket assumption about male behavior, are they not discriminating against a category or class of Americans as a Southern racist might blacks?
Women’s sexual discrimination shares another unfortunate trait with the racial variety – innateness. The racist condemns all black people because they are innately inferior; and the female sexist condemns all men because of their innate, genetically-programmed, inescapable abusive behavior.
Most women and men share none of these discriminatory feelings. Women understand that men have pursued them aggressively for a million years; and that women have been reluctant, diffident, and dismissive in response. Taking on all comers would be tantamount to throwing survival to the winds; and up till recently, women have always played this careful, selective role.
Strong, confident women today know that there are far too many men who cannot manage their sexual drives; and who, instead of solving the puzzle of women’s desire, turn violent; and are on the lookout. Women’s radar is highly attuned to the boor and dismiss him easily. They pick up negativism, frustration, and crossed wires, and move on quickly.
In other words, they understand men – what makes them tick, their strengths and weaknesses, and how they can be led. They are careful to avoid situations where boors can turn nasty. They know that despite feminist manifestos, provocative dress and sexual flirtation can indeed lead to unwanted sexual advances; and have learned when and how to behave to get what they want and deter what they don’t.
All men talk dirty, always have, always will. Savvy women understand men’s boasting, braggadocio, and lewdness; and know that it derives from three sources – male libido which forces men to think about sex all the time; competition; and sexual insecurity.
Men are obsessed with sexual conquest, anxious to best all competitors, but timid and unsure around women. They talk big in the locker room, share stories of sexual adventures, ogle pictures of naked women, and puff, prance, and strut; but cannot seem to find the gumption to make the first move.
Knowing this, savvy women dismiss the talk as silly sexual ineptness, use the poison-tipped, ego-deflating feminine rapier to deflate all ignorant comers, and clear the way for those few confident, admiring, appreciative suitors who get them.
Strong, confident men understand that women raised in patriarchal families respond to men like Daddy – unquestioning love, kindness, support, and admiration. These men know that the way to a woman’s heart is to reflect Daddy. Patience, respect, interest, and courtesy are not only good general social skills but the unequivocal keys to sexual conquest.
These men know that even in an age of sexual freedom, women are offended by sexual ineptness. An arm around a woman’s shoulders at the wrong moment is inappropriate, but at the right moment a sign of affection and interest. Women have always been the arbiters of physical intimacy; and all but the most obtuse or disturbed men respond accordingly.
The reason why the war between the sexes, usually a stalemate, has gone out of kilter is because of the current progressive demands for recognition, retribution, and compensation regarding race, gender, and ethnicity. In an era of such universal reform, the sanctity and identity of each aggrieved group is tantamount. Rights and privileges not enjoyed by the majority will be awarded to the minority until balance has been reestablished or achieved.
Men, white people, and Anglos need to back off while minority grievances are redressed and social equilibrium is restored.
Normal sexual relations have been interrupted by ‘No Means No’ and the legal processing that must occur before any male advances. An inept gesture of hope and interest (the arm around the shoulder) is not dismissed as such but decried as abusive groping. In such a climate a focus on actual, real, indefensible sexual aggression risks being blurred.
Resolution to any conflict becomes more difficult when one side intractably assumes the moral ground. Not only does such sanctimony hinder any understanding and mediation, it fuels resentment, anger, and hatred on the other side. More whites have negative feelings about blacks the more groups like Black Lives Matter make unrealistic demands based on questionable evidence. More men resent women in this environment of universal condemnation and calumny than before.
Strong women have always managed the most difficult of men. The fictional defiant heroines of Ibsen, Strindberg, and Shakespeare – Hedda Gabler, Rebekka West, Laura, Miss Julie, Gertrude, Margaret, Goneril, Regan, and Volumnia – were more than a match for their weak, errant husbands; and negotiated the patriarchal societies of Victorian Europe and Elizabethan England with ease and dispatch. Did anyone worry about Golda Meir, Margaret Thatcher, or Indira Gandhi?
Or Mary Callahan Erdoes, CEO J.P. Morgan Asset Management; Abigail Johnson, CEO Fidelity Investment; Marie Chandoha, CEO Charles Schwab; or Charlotte McLaughlin, President and CEO, PNC Capital Markets?
It is to these women – strong, self-assured, aggressive, smart, and savvy – that feminists should turn as examples of women who have – like Shakespeare’s historical heroines – navigated the treacherous waters of male dominion with conviction and aplomb. Young women who are brought up to believe that they are victims, that the enemy is everywhere, and that they need and deserve protection can never become strong and self-assured. The world is a dangerous, tricky place, and only the fittest survive – true for politics and true for mating.
It is encouraging to see that the tide may be turning slightly. Conservative activists have challenged progressive reasoning and have insisted that university administrators re-calibrate the scales of justice and encouraged men not to take allegations without defense.
Male students on campus have for too long, they argue been asked to give up their rights to due process in the name of exposing predatory, abusive behavior. Women, even those with questionable claims, have been encouraged to speak out because they have for so long been forced to remain silent.
Everyone in America seems to be warring with someone else as identity politics takes its toll. Yet, given the long-overdue rise of women to political and corporate power, perhaps the inflamed and discriminatory rhetoric against men can be quieted as women begin to assume more responsibility for their own fate.
To be sure, the world is a dangerous place; and the erosion of traditional morals seems epidemic. Crime of all kinds is endemic and growing in many areas. Women especially need to be particularly wary of criminal assault; and the full force of the law should be leveled on those convicted of it. At the same time, the world that most of us inhabit is not so dangerous or fraught with threat. We deal with bullies, jerks, dopes, and assholes all the time. We learn to sort them and toss them overboard and move on. This is the normal world of men and women.